Ive enjoyed Purrrfect Videos Real XXX Letters series and mistakenly picked this one up thinking it was the next volume. Oops! Nothing is further from the fact. Real Sexxx Letters is a cheap ripoff of a successful series.

The first evidence that this DVD will have problems is to look at the cast list. Any production that includes Rob Rotten can be considered second-rate immediately. This guy is a walking freak show, with tattoos covering his entire body and a spiked Mohawk that is just plain frightening. To try to pass him off as a porn star is an insult to all other porners. He is, quite ...

The Little Details

Running Time: 75 min.

Production Date: 7 / 9 / 2003

Director: Jimmy DiGiorgio

Cast: Crystal Ray, Nikki Lynn, Rachel Rotten, Katarina McKenna, Lovely Lexi, John West, Rafe, Rob Rotten, Hamilton Steele, and Dave Pounder

The Short Story

Initial Expectations: Jimmy D has made some good movies. Im looking forward to this one.

Initial Reaction: Its okay, but nowhere near close to special.

Who Should Watch It : Fans of the stars in the movie

Who Should Avoid It: Anybody wanting something special or well done technical aspects

The Technical Stuff

Audio /Video Quality: The audio is okay. The voice overs are kept at about the same level as the action in the scenes, and I dont think I heard a single background noise. Some of the dialogue in the movie is a bit low, and often left a bit to be desired. The video leaves much more to be desired. Its often a bit dark and has a fair amount of grain and cloudiness as well as a few very noticeable remnants. Its almost like watching a VHS picture.

Music: The music is a bit on the loud side, but not so much to interfere with it a lot. It varies a bit in style, but normally goes for a slightly romantic or sexy style.

Disc Complaints: When you select the option that lets you play the main feature from the main menu, youre subjected to a commercial before the movie starts. I would have tried to skip it, but my player had problems with this DVD and I was afraid it would foul up worse if I did. The DVD also didnt appear to have a time stamp, which always ticks me off as I like to jump around the movie occasionally or jump directly to specific points in the movie. Without a time stamp Im unable to do this.

Menus: The menus are pretty good. The main menu has a little different animation which gives it a unique feel. The chapter menu is pretty standard, and lets you choose a scene based on a small clip of each scene.

The Feature

Real SeXXX Letters focus on varied sexual experiences, much like the letters column on most adult magazines. This gives each scene a small story lead-in, but its often very short and easily skipped if you want to get right to the action.

Scene 1 - Crystal Ray and John West

Crystal starts things out writing to Real Sex Letters about getting it on with coworker John despite HRs rules. They kiss before John makes his way down to get a taste of Crystals other lips while she lays back on her desk. Crystal thanks him with a little head, complete with nice eyes and a small smile, before laying back on her desk for John to dip his pen in her pink ink. They also fuck in standing doggie and the cameraman favorite reverse cowgirl before Crystal hops off and takes a very impressive pop from John in her mouth.

This is an okay scene. Crystal puts in some nice energy into the scene and handles the pop shot extremely well. She even keeps her eyes open for it and tries to collect it all. The only thing missing from it sexually is a swallow at the end to finish things right. The camera work also left a bit to be desired, and had long focuses on close-ups rather than a nice mix of everything.

Scene 2 - Katarina KcKenna and Rafe

Bored housewife Katarina writes in to tell about the fantasy she had to deal with the boring repetitive sex she has with her husband. She starts out in a cage before Rafe pulls her out and lets her suck his cock briefly. He examines her a little before going down on her with his tongue and fingers, and then has her climb up to ride him reverse cowgirl style. They work through a few other common positions before Katarina finishes things up taking a decent facial.

This was an okay scene at best. Katarina seemed to get into things okay, but the scene was a bit slow and pretty dark. This really interfered with my getting into the scene, and because of it. Katarina is kinda cute, so I hope to see her again to give her another chance.

Scene 3 - Rachel Rotten and Rob Rotten

Rachel, who has a Bettie Page type of a look going on, gets it on with Rob, who has a heavily pierced, mohawk, suitcase pimp type of look going on, who she writes isnt the type of guy she normally goes for. He makes his way across her pierced nipples in his kisses before going down on her, and then lets Rachel suck his cock. Rachel lets Rob fuck her missionary style before spooning her. They work through a couple more positions before Rob gives Rachel a little dribble of dick droppings, some of which she looks like she might have swallowed down.

This scene leaves me with mixed emotions. As soon as I saw Rob my expectations plummeted, and I cant say that he impressed me too much throughout the scene. He does good for a suitcase pimp, but still not so good that I expect to see too much of him if the girl has another choice. Rachel, however, did a very good job. She puts some nice energy and emotion into the scene, and impressed me enough that I hope to see more of her in the future (and hopefully with somebody else).

Scene 4 - Lovely Lexi and Hamilton Steele

Hamilton Steel, whos one of the best actors out there right now in my opinion (and who first bulked up to stop looking like Scott Lyons but has now shaved his head to look like Rod Fontana) takes on Lexi in the back room of his workplace in the penultimate scene. After she gropes him and he expresses his surprise, Hamilton works his way up and down her body with both his tongue and hands. He undresses her before licking her smoothly shaven slit and playing with it while she sucks him. They start things off missionary style so that Hamilton can get Lexis feet a little attention while he fucks her, before Lexi rolls around on the table so that she and Hamilton can interact a little more. They sneak in a bit of reverse cowgirl before Hamilton gives Lexi a very nice facial.

This is a pretty good scene, and one of the best in the feature. Lexi and Hamilton have great chemistry, and seem to enjoy keeping each other going. Its a bit on the slow side, but it feels slow and caring rather than boring. Im used to seeing Hamilton do hot and intense, so its nice to see his range expand a bit more with this scene.

Scene 5 - Nikki Lynn and Dave Pounder

Nikki tells Real Sexxx Letters about how she normally works out in the park every day. When her husband leaves her on a business trip she continues her daily routine and falls during her gymnastic workout. Dave helps her to her car and she takes him home to give him a proper thank you. She guides his hands to where shes hurting, and then gives him a kiss to let him know that hes found the right place. Dave continues the kissing, but moves his mouth to her lower lips while she pulls up her top to reveal a nicely implanted pair of funbags. They work through a bit of reverse cowgirl, spooning, and missionary. Finally, Dave pulls out and lets Nikki know that hes about to come before decorating her front.

This is another very average scene. Nikki is okay looking, but seems like your stereotypical star due to piercings, tattoos, and her fairly worn look. She and Dave do an okay job, but I found it way too easy to look away at any time.

Real SeXXX Letters is a fun idea that just doesnt quite work out for me. The setups are okay, but theyre so stereotypical that I felt like Id seen the scene openings a thousand times before. That doesnt mean that a used opening kills a scene, but it certainly doesnt start it out the best. Here, my disappointment at the start of most of the scenes continued because the camera work was a bit disappointing and the lighting often was well on the shy side. I couldnt get past these problems even though most of the cast does a good job. Rachel Rotten does a very nice job, as does Lovely Lexi. For the guys, Hamilton Steele, who constantly impresses me with his performances, while the rest of the guys just seemed okay. Although the sex has some nice feeling, it also feels very slow. None of the scenes gave me the feeling that the performers were so into each other that they couldnt hold back and had to go at it good and hard. Real SeXXX Letters is a pretty standard porno without too much to separate it from the rest of the crowd.

The Extra Stuff

Trailers are included for International Booty 5, Pussy Sweat, 2 Young 4 U 2, Test Drive, Legal Skin 11, and Legal Skin 12. The photo gallery lasts about two minutes with roughly eight seconds per decent looking framed photo. Theres also website information, commercials, and a behind the scenes featurette.

The behind the scenes featurette lasts about ten minutes. Theres interviews with all of the female cast, as well as Hamilton Steele and Jimmy D (no, that doesnt mean that either of them likes cock too, at least as far as I know). The girls talk a bit about themselves, where theyre from, tattoos, and things like that. You get a nice look at the personalities of the performers as well as learning a little about them.

The Down -n- Dirty Sex Stuff

Themes: Straight, interracial, and toe-ing

Raincoat Factor: High

Condom Usage: None

The Bottom Line:

Currently, many Smash DVDs can be found online for between $14 and $24 with most stores offering them in the $20 range. Aim low on this one. Its an okay movie, but theres nothing really special about it. The technical aspects are also the worst Ive seen from Smash, but there are a couple nice extras.

Note to Smash Pictures: Please pay a little more attention to your quality control. I dont know if I just got a bad disc here or not, but youre still a fairly young studio and people will remember every little problem they have with you just because youre new.

If you have any questions or comments, please e-mail me .

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